Everyone gets nervous on a first date. Spending time with a new person, finding things to talk about, and getting to know someone on a personal level are all what make first dates fun and exciting. However, there’s a difference between a few nerves and a complete disaster of a first date. Here are some things to look for that will tell you the date is going poorly, and what to do if these things happen.
One of the easiest ways to tell if your date is going well or not is the conversation. If there’s a nice balance back and forth and the conversation is easy, it’s safe the say the date is going well. Don’t worry about a few awkward moments of silence, everyone will have those on the first date. But if those awkward silences drag out and you’re struggling to find things to talk about, it’s not a good sign for the future of this relationship.
Sometimes there might not be issues with keeping the conversation going, but the issue could be what the conversation is about. If your date keeps turning the conversation to talk about themselves, try asking open-ended questions that would lead them to ask you the same question in return. A good conversation will balance between talking about you and your date equally.
On a similar note, if your date is asking you all of the questions in rapid-fire succession, chances are they’re looking for something very specific in a partner, which can make the date feel awkward and tense. First dates are meant to be fun and light – going into a date looking for specific traits and qualities is a fast way to ruin that first date.
Too Much Phone Time
It can be hard to put our phones away, but spending too much time on your phone immediately lets your date know that you’re not interested. If your date can’t seem to put their phone down to focus on you and the date, it’s a clear sign that the date isn’t going well. A tip to set the right expectation for your first date is to allow your date to see you put your phone away – when they see that you put your phone away, they’re much more likely to do it themselves.
No Eye Contact
First dates are all about discovering your chemistry and compatibility with someone new. If there’s no eye contact throughout the date, the chemistry just isn’t there. There’s a huge difference between looking away shyly and never looking at your date to begin with. No eye contact makes the date incredibly awkward and shows a lack of self-confidence.
Eye contact is very meaningful, especially on a first date. It can show your interest and attraction, but it can also show that you genuinely care about someone when they’re speaking to you.
Don’t Be Afraid To End It
If you’ve experienced any of these issues on a first date, you know how much of a relief it is when the date is over. You don’t have to sit there and suffer. Don’t be afraid to end the date early if it just isn’t working for you. You’re doing your date and yourself a favour by not wasting everyone’s time. While it can be difficult, be honest about ending the date – don’t make up an excuse that leaves your date hanging. It’s much better for everyone involved to end the date early while being upfront about it.
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